Dear World of the Future,
I know it seems hard to believe that one man can be responsible for such greatness, but there you have it.
Now, I don’t wanna take all the credit for finding the cure to cancer, creating the first car to run on urine, or single-handedly ending war in the Middle east, but… well, yeah, that was all me.
I’d be willing to give credit to anybody else who had played a part in it, but what can i say? I work better alone.
Now, just a heads up, I haven’t quite done all that yet in 2011, but c’mon, I’m only 23. Gimme some time to grow into my greatness, okay?
If by any chance, I don’t accomplish some or any of these goals, I’ll be sure to write an amendment to this letter (I won’t) that you found in this time capsule buried behind the holiest of locations in the 21st century, the Olive Garden on Cermak.
By the way, you’re welcome.
P.S. By now, I hope my exploits will be known worldwide, but I figured I’d leave my name just to be safe