Dear Troll

Dear Troll,
Look, not that I don’t appreciate a good pop culture reference when I see one (Alexander Cabot III was a solid sign off) but let’s talk about some of your issues with my “oh-so-devastating critique”, shall we?
See, just because other people like to hide behind the anonymity of the internet, doesn’t make it my style.
Let’s begin, shall we?
As for your first claim that I couldn’t possibly understand the appeal of something “40 years or old”, as a result of being under the age of forty one, well, that’s only half right.
It’s true, I’m not forty one. It’s not true that I’ve never understood the appeal of something made before I was born. In fact, if you’d read a little closer, you’d see how I said I enjoyed Scooby Doo even if I found Josie and the Pussycats to be a little formulaic. It’s easy to overlook things when you’re trying to prove a point, I get it.
As for not enjoying animated girls in leotards? Well, I’m not exactly what you’d call a “shrieking fruit” but if you’re implying that I prefer men, you’d be correct. Of course, and I’m not sure if you knew this, but being gay means you can’t find members of the opposite sex attractive in any way, shape, or form. Well, according to you at least… Personally, I’d be more concerned about you finding cartoons from the 70s to be sexually viable candidates, but hey, as long as you’re not hurting yourself or others, what business is it of mine?
Finally, your last claim of me somehow being idiotic because I think Josie and her bandmates should play to their strengths and either focus on their music or their detective work isn’t so much a result of me being unable to walk and chew gum… it’s more one of those things where i feel like being really good at one thing is better than being mediocre at two, but I could see how you could read it as such.
I guess in conclusion, I’d just have to say I’m not sure you should rest on your laurels just yet. You’ve got some work to do on your debate skills, but hey, if this was college, I’d totally give you an A for effort. Oh, and finally? If you don’t like what I have to write, I’d recommend not reading it.
I tend not to pander to the elitist, self-important and painfully self-righteous crowd, but with the whole wide world of the internet being what it is, I’m sure you can find someone who does.
Best of luck in your search.
Sincerely,
Calhoun

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2 thoughts on “Dear Troll

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