Dear Woman at Caribou On Her Cell Phone

Dear Woman at Caribou On Her Cell Phone,
I know that it’s been a few days since we last encountered one another, but I wanted to give each of us some time to cool off.
I realize that sometimes I can be a pretty harsh judge of character… this is not one of those cases.
Not that your inane prattling about the inefficacy of your boss wasn’t amusing because, trust me, you commenting on the manners of anyone else is about as amusing as it gets.
Still, I think it’s fair to say that there is a time and a place for everything.
You, alone, sitting at a table for four in a crowded coffee shop where people are trying to do their work?
Yeah, that’s not a good time or place.
But by far the best part?
As you sit there, yammering on about how your boss never does any work (all the while doing no work of your own) you just sat there.
Sure, you shifted your weight a couple times, but not once did you think “ya know what? Why don’t I take this call outside? Maybe not for the other patrons, but how about for my own privacy?”
But to expect you to act out of anything but pure selfishness? yeah, you’re right, that is kinduva lot to ask.
Still, it was the fact that you spent 20 minutes on your cell phone, finished your call, then packed up and left that gets to me.
Aren’t we supposed to be the multi-tasking generation? What, you can’t pack highlighters into a giant purse and talk on the phone at the same time?
Once again, my hope for the future of America dies a little when I see people like you.
Sincerely,
Calhoun

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2 thoughts on “Dear Woman at Caribou On Her Cell Phone

  1. Calhoun, I have lost count of the numbers of dbags, both male and female, that I’ve witnessed behaving similarly in our little coffee house. The ones that really, really, really get me…The Skypers. The Skypers, for whatever reason, think that because they’re skyping they need to talk ESPECIALLY LOUD.

    So, I’ve taken to relentlessly staring at all these dbags to the point where they’re horribly uncomfortable and stop, leave, or initiate a confrontation. The confrontations are super fun.

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