Dear Vanilla Ice

Dear Vanilla Ice,
Listen, I’m not a PR professional by any means, so just take this as it is… unsolicited, probably not-very-helpful advice.
We al loved you in the 90s. “Ice, Ice Baby?” That song was my jam! Still is when I’m feelin’ nostalgic.
“Ninja Rap?” Easily one of the greatest parts of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze.
But let’s look at your most recent claims to fame…
Bar appearances?
VH1 reality shows?
C’mon, buddy! You’re better than that.
Besides, the whole white rapper thing? It may have been novel, but if we’re being realistic, Eminem’s kinda cornered that market now.
All I’m saying is, it might be time to rebrand. Think about it.
Sincerely,
Calhoun

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