Dear Roommate


Dear Roommate,
I’d like to start off my apologizing.
When you asked me if you could have the living room since you were gonna have some folks over from your high school days, I thought, “Eh, it’s his place too, why the hell not?” Even now, that’s still my stance. You have just as much a right to entertain as I do… you just exercise your right, while the most social interaction I have in a given day is with the pizza guy.
See, I don’t know how, but it always slips my mind that your high school friends are from back in Alabama.
This is nothing against them or your hometown or anything like that, but well, I always forget that a lot of your friends come from different… political backgrounds than I do.
So when I brought up the original Planet of the Apes being my favorite of the franchise, even with Charleton Heston’s NRA-fanaticism, I should’ve known I would’ve been met with the whole 2nd Amendment argument. I believe his actual words were, “Nah, it’s the 2nd Amendment, it’s in the Constitution, brah!” I quickly steered clear of the topic. Never mind the fact that an AK-47, which some folks are trying to make street legal, has pretty much never been used to protect someone’s home before. Don’t even factor in the sickening number of gun-related deaths in Chicago alone.
The fact of the matter is, I have a compelling argument for why I’m pro-gun control, but after a couple of beers and having just met two of them? It seemed like an inopportune time, so my bad.


2 thoughts on “Dear Roommate

  1. I avoid that discussion at all costs. Particularly since I discovered the inlawas were packing heat at my Christmas party a few years ago. I’m all for 2nd Amendment rights … as long as the people with guns only shoot at other people with guns.

    • Update on this whole thing, the guy was, like, half-kidding, but seriously, I hate guns so I guess I just didn’t laugh… All I’m saying is, an AK-47 is not meant for “household use.”

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