Dear Asian Community

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Dear Asian Community,
The other night, my roommate, who was admittedly inebriated, wagered a bet of a million dollars that Knives from Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World was the same random Asian in Jennifer’s Body.
He was subsequently proven wrong. Although Diablo Cody seemingly only knows one Asian, because it definitely was the Asian chick from Juno. I’m not being racist, I checked, I swear.
On behalf of my roommate, I offer my apologies. What he said was indicative of one of the worst racial stereotypes, that all Asians look the same.
Also, I apologize on my behalf… because I laughed. Like, really hard.
From then on, we’ve discussed all the different movies “Knives was in.”
The Joy Luck Club. Kung Fu Hustle.
It got really bad… so, I just wanted to apologize for us white people.
If you want, I’ll help you think up some offensive stereotypes for us.
It only seems fair.
Sincerely,
Calhoun

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