Dear Craigslist Poster

Screen shot 2013-02-06 at 9.39.25 PM

Dear Craigslist Poster,
I was writing because I was inquiring about a writing position you had posted.
Angry? Yup.
Gay? You got it.
Man? Last time I checked…
I’m just getting hung up on that last part. “Recently dumped.”
Can we expand “recently” to include the last two years? Cuz that’s the only way I’m qualified…
Oh, but I am angry, you better believe it!
Want me to prove it? I can tell a bunch of orphans that Santa doesn’t exist?
Too far? All I’m saying is, I’m the man for the job!
Oh… I’m also saying I desperately need a job.
So, I guess I’m saying two things… whatever, just lemme know.


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