Dear Neighbors Next Building Over

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Dear Neighbors Next Building Over,
Hey there, you probably don’t recognize me, I’m your next door neighbor.
I know, in apartment complexes you’ve got plenty of those to choose from, but I’m sure you know who I am.
I’m the guy who’s too lazy to get dressed when he takes his dog out in the morning, so you’ve probably seen me walking my dog in some shamrock boxer briefs? No?
Okay, maybe this will refresh your memory… when you folks were throwing beer cans from the top floor to watch them explode on the sidewalk below, I’m the guy who came out of his apartment, yelled “knock it the fuck off!” then went back inside?
There we go, I knew that you’d recognize me!
Anyways, I just wanted to thank you all.
Thanks to you, the front office had a noise complaint filed against me for yelling at you for being too loud.
Irony is fun, isn’t it?
Sincerely,
Calhoun

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5 thoughts on “Dear Neighbors Next Building Over

  1. WOW – Is that backwards or what?! Even this little piggy can see the problem with that. Shakes piggy head. If you want, I can come over and fertilize their yard for you… if you know what I mean – oinks. XOXO – Bacon

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