Dear Roommate

funny-roommate-notes-5

Dear Roommate,
If you don’t wanna talk to me for a while after I yelled yesterday, well- well, that’s okay by me.
You’re a good guy, but to say I’m tired of your bullshit is the understatement of the century.
Seriously, if they could turn double standards into an Olympic sport, you’d be Michael fuckin’ Phelps.
I have never seen someone so comfortable imposing judgments on others.
The other day? I wasn’t done cooking, when you sighed heavily, grabbed one of my dishes and oh so kindly put it away for me.
What do I wake up to every morning?
The same bowl on the kitchen table day in and day out because you don’t like having to take a bowl out each morning.
So yeah, it might be awkward for a little while, but I think a little time apart will do us some good… like, maybe we’ll talk on move-out day? How does that work for you? Cuz that sounds great to me.
Sincerely,
Calhoun

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s