Dear ABC Spirits

Dear ABC Spirits,
You’re fuckin’ weird.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m a fan of how nice your stores are, but am i in a liquor store or a goddamn Macy’s?
I just think it’s kinda weird that you guys take such pride in your appearance, but here’s the thing… you’re a government-run liquor store (North Carolina regulates liquor sales) so… uh- how do I put this lightly?
You folks have absolutely no competition.
You don’t hafta try so damn hard! Or at least encourage other states to pick up the slack.
Chicago’s liquor stores are garbage…
Sincerely,
Calhoun